I wrote an Episode of "Criminal Minds"

We're gonna profile the HELL out of this blog!

I got a secret: I love the CBS crime drama Criminal Minds.

I don't know when I specifically started liking this show above other crime dramas. I think it has to do with the whole game of psychological "cat n mouse" they play with their suspects. Or it could be the fact that they have a cute nerd who does their fact checking. Either way, I love the show so much, the producers decided that as a thanks, they're gonna let me write an episode.
 It was actually fairly easy. I think it's going to be really interesting, while still maintaining the unique nature of the show. It's still in pre-production, but here's a quick clip from the script to get people excited. This is the team discussing their latest UnSub ("unknown subject") in a very detailed manner


SCENE: Quantico: BAU headquarters



Gideon (voiceover): Woody Allen once said, "Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage."



Hotchner: *In front of their information board* Blah blah blah blah Series of brutal abductions/rapes/murders/arsons/bombings in a town called blah


Reid: Blah blah blah blah SEXUAL SADISM blah blah MALIGNANT NARCISSISM blah


Prentiss: Sounds like a Blah blah blah blah He has to blah blah blah to establish his blah.


Reid: TED BUNDY used to blah blah something something blah blah to his victims too.


Gideon: *looks at the board very poignantly as he realizes...* .... Blah....


Morgan: Just got a call from something something precinct. They said something something something about something something something.

Hotchner: .... Lets move!


END SCENE


***


Powerful stuff huh? Later on, the team begins to zero in on the UnSub and the real excitement begins.


SCENE: Team is on the move


*Morgan's Cell phone rings. It's Garcia*


Garcia:Blah blah blah FEDERAL LAW ENFORCEMENT FBI CIA JOINT TACTICAL DATABASE and found something something CROSSED REFERENCED IT WITH OUR something something and found blah blah blah blah his name is GUY MCPERSON he lives at 5555 Location Place

SUDDEN SCENE SHIFT: Cabin in the middle of the woods (because it is ALWAYS a cabin in the woods)

*FBI van moves in. As it does, a scuzzy, raggedly dressed 20 something male runs from the house and attempts to flee. This is Guy McPerson, our unsub. Morgan and Hotchner chase on foot while the rest of the team secure the cabin.*


*The Unsub tries to lose his tail, but eventually is subdued and taken down by Hotchner*


Hotchner: Blah blah blah innocent people blah blah what the HELL is wrong with you?


McPerson: Blah blah blah WHORES AND SLUTS WHO NEEDED TO BE PUNISHED... BLAH!


End SCENE


SCENE: exterior Shot of FBI jet


Gideon (voiceover): "The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done."-- George Carlin... blah

 EXUENT

***

So what do you guys think? I think the cast is really excited...





I’m just playing Criminal minds, you know I love you!

Also... Penelope Garcia is teh sexxxy!